Its hard work to be in WISE MIND. I am constantly battling the lies fed in my head. My past keeps me fighting to try to stay in the present moment because there hasn’t been much letting go on my end. The worries of tomorrow are jumbled up, too.
How do I deal with it?
Today I decided to celebrate today by worshiping the Lord. There I felt at peace. I woke up feeling a little off kilter, but what I heard is God loves me the way I am and loves me regardless of what state I am in and desires nothing but good for me. Yes, there are times when I feel like God forsook me. Yet, when I think about the price He paid for me, I can see how He was forsaken by His own Father for you and me. Unfathomable. It really is. Me. Me with all my illnesses and nutty ways. Jesus loves me. If I believe God has forsaken me, then I believe He doesn’t love me. If He loves me and His Spirit resides in me, then God can and will truly heal me of all of my hurts. His word states that God who began a good work in me will complete it. Maybe you’ll think I am stupid, but how can I, a believer and follower of Christ, turn my back on the One who won’t ever forsake me? Even in the worst situations or times of my life God promises to always be there for me.
As my DBT counselor says, “stand up against the lies swarming around in your head! When you are in WISE MIND, what matters is the very present moment you are living.” That statement is true. Yes, there has been many times when everything else seem to have won over me staying in the present moment, but there are many times, realized and not, that I have lived knowing how beautiful life is in the present moment.
Right this moment, I stand up to the demons in my head, and want to praise God for how He sees the depths of my heart and loves me the same.